• 14:27 Half two is far too late for the first coffee of the day...

Well, some of them.

I mentioned yesterday about our friends' son being in the paper. They have a digital edition, which I downloaded and cropped - here's Ruaidhri! (He should have some accents and things on his name, but I have no clue how or where.)

Told you he was a cutie. And here is the hairy baby I was on about:

And here is a baby in what appears to be a wig:

EDIT: I've been asked to point out that Wiggy Baby is actually called Miel Mozo. Very cool name.

Tooken from here.

1. Have you ever successfully played a prank on anyone?

Oh yes. I think I've probably blogged about his before, but I'll tell it again just in case. A friend came to visit us in Wales, and we spent the day telling her ghost stories about the creepy old man who lived in the woods at the bottom of the garden and asked the local kids to come and play and then killed them in horrible ways. That night, we set the ring tone on my mobile to a recording of me whispering her name in a horrible way and saying "come out and play", and hid it under her bed. A while after she went to bed, we rang the phone - the screams were amazing!

Another time, we set the phone to silent and put it in a creepy dolls house that was in the room, so when we rang it in the middle of the night, it lit up from inside...

2. Has anyone ever successfully played a prank on you?

Google had me going the other year with their "water pipe broadband" for April fools. I was all excited about it and started to tell Landers how cool it was before I finished reading the page and realised it was all bollocks.

3. Do you think they moon landings were faked?

I can see why some people think so, but no. There are plausible explanations for all the proof the conspiracy theorists have to offer.

4. What the best April Fools day prank you've heard of?

I loved the spaghetti trees from the 50s or whenever it was.

5. Complete this sentence: "Fool me once, shame on me, fool me twice..."

...you can't fool me again! (What WERE they thinking?!)

• 17:27 Thinking that my toes may have been replaced with icicles while I wasn't looking...
• 20:46 Fire is roaring, feet are toasty, dogs and cats are sleeping... bring on the weekend!

Hmph. I get ordered to do some washing, which is all very good, but I can't actually dry any of it at the moment!

It's raining, so no lineage. We've run out of oil for the heating (something that will not be rectified until this time next week when Landers gets paid) so no radiatorage, and the tumble dryer is still playing up, mainly cos I've not told the landlord about it yet. So, basket of wet laundry is currently sat in the utility room, with another load sloshing round in the washing machine. I may have to resort to some sort of improvised structure consisting of dining chairs and coat-hangers in front of the fire. Although am worried that chairs and laundry may spontaneously combust.

Still, I'm sure it'll stop raining soon enough. Maybe.

It's not even proper fecking rain, just little drizzly bits.

In other news, our friends' little boy is in the paper today, in their bonnie babies special pullout thing - I know I'm biased but he's the cutest one there. It helps that the little boy (or possibly girl) next to him is kinda hairy. And not on his or her head...

• 20:01 Under orders to fetch a Chinese.
• 20:54 Nomming Chinese curry. Avec peas.

• 16:10 Oooh Safari 4 is purty.

I had this in an email from my sister. Decided to actually do a meme for once!

Six names you go by
1. Brad
2. Bradley
3. Bradders
4. Bert
5. Scoobydoofus
6. Uncle

Three things you are wearing right now:
1. Trackies
2. T-shirt
3. Schlippers

Two things you want very badly at the moment:
1. Another delicious cheeseburger like the one I had last night...
2. A job!

Two things you did last night:
1. Watched "How to Lose Friends and Alienate People"
2. Finally got Cold Weather Flying on WoW!

Three favourite beverages:
1. Coffee
2. Lager
3. Vodka and Coke

Two things you ate today:
1. Nothing yet.
2. Still nothing. Unless you count toothpaste.

Two people you last talked to on the phone:
1. Landers
2. My Mom

Two things you are going to do tomorrow:
1. Try to get some money!
2. Play with the dogs.

Two things you are not good at:
1. Saving money.
2. Making gnocchi.

• 16:38 Maynards Sours. Not quite as good as Haribo Tangfastics, but a close second.
• 20:05 Anticipating burger and chips a la Landers. *belly rumble*

I honestly can't decide if this is hot or not. I had a bit of a thing for one of my PE teachers, but he didn't wear such silly shorts...

I think I'm leaning towards hot, but that might just be because it's him.

Insert your own pun about blowing things if you like.

I've been meaning to blog this for a while now. Google, as you may know, is available in a wide variety of languages. You can go in and fiddle with the settings and have display things in pretty much any language you like.

Including Pirate.

My Google has been set to Pirate for a few months now, and it's fupping marvellous. Instead of searching for images, you search for "engravin's", you "sail into port" to log in, and for advanced searches, I "use me better spyglass".

Sometimes it takes a bit of time to mentally translate, but it makes me smile often.

Other languages you may be interested are Elmer Fudd and bork, bork, bork!

If you want to have a look, the preferences (or "Me Likes an' Dislikes") page is here, and the setting you want to change is the first one - "Interface Language".

• 09:38 I have coffee and a 50" telly. I am content.
• 09:50 Preparing to WoW in three... two... one...
• 10:07 Giggling at a lvl 80 Dwarf called Bigbadpoof.
• 14:56 Yay! Got my car back!
• 17:07 Heading hooooome...
• 18:12 Dogs playing on recently mown lawn = green paws.

"Nick's favourite porn site was an eye-opening experience for NobBob..."

Post yours in the comments!

(It's a still from a video that NotBob posted!)

Our telly is like the second one...

Rant alert!

A small disclaimer: I'm not having a go at Christians as a whole, I'm referring to a small minority group here.

I'm sat here giggling away to myself and I'm only about five minutes into this - a "film" about the "homosexual agenda" in America.

It's produced by the American Family Association (AFA), and it claims to be highlighting how society (and by that they mean Christians) are being targeted by gay propaganda aimed at normalising homosexuality (as if that's a bad thing). The bulk of the evidence for this claim is based on a book called "After The Ball" which was apparently published in the early 90s and outlines how homosexuality could be "promoted" to make it more mainstream and acceptable. I've googled the book, and found very little information about it. What I have found is a lot of Christian sites posting about how outrageous it is. You'd think that if there was an insidious conspiracy, it'd be a little more widespread.

There have been several laugh-out-loud moments so far, including their horror at the number of recurring gay characters in TV shows this year (illustrated by stills of promotional shots for programmes such as Will & Grace and Friends, both of which finished years ago and one of which doesn't really have a 'recurring' gay character - how often was Ross' ex-wife in Friends, especially in the later seasons?).

They keep going on about how the book they're talking about says the "affect is achieved without reference to facts, logic or proof", and at the same time they are banging on about the bible - you know, that scientific text that "proves" the world was created in six days, and then all human life sprang from two people who lived for hundreds of years, and then the world was flooded and remade, and wearing mixed fibres is a sin. If they want to believe all that, that's up to them. But it does make them look silly when they start spouting about "proof".

There's a woman who used to be a lesbian. Apparently, this is proof that there's no gay gene. Phew! We can tell all the people researching that avenue to stop - the AFA have the answer. You can all stop looking now. She goes on about how she was gay because her mother was beaten by her dad and she didn't want to be weak, so she became masculine. Hmm. Yes, some lesbians are quite masculine, but what makes them lesbians is that they are attracted to women. The film claims that people can "get over" homosexuality if they try hard enough (and with the help of Jesus). Like it's a choice.

They repeatedly state that homosexuals are fighting for special rights. No, actually - we're campaigning for equal rights. No special treatment, just the same treatment. I want the same opportunities as a heterosexual person. I have many of them, but that doesn't make it right that I don't have them all. Why should I have to just settle for what I've got? And, realistically, what difference does it make to anyone else if I get fewer state benefits if I claim Jobseekers Allowance as part of a couple?

Apparently homosexuality is "promoted" to kids. I certainly didn't have a campaign directed at me, and look how I turned out! What's the explanation for that?

This film is the most atrocious piece of propaganda I've ever witnessed. If it wasn't so laughable, it would be highly offensive. I don't doubt that there are gay people in lofty political positions working towards an agenda where homosexuals are treated better than they have been in the past. But a sinister homosexual agenda? Pffft.

The worst of it is that they are making out that all gay people live their lives by this book that I have certainly never heard of, like it's the gay bible. It's pure scare-mongering, and the people who pay attention already agree with everything they have to say anyway. They're not going to "convert" anybody with this twaddle. There are now a load of people in America who are going to think they're armed with facts because they saw it on a "documentary". Very sad.

I don't agree with Christians being "silenced", they have a right to their opinions and to be able to express them appropriately just as I do. Key word: APPROPRIATELY! But I have a right to live my life as I see fit within the law, and if the law is unfair due to omission or discrimination, I have a right to ask for it to be revised or abolished. It happens all the time, and it is not wrong.

Society has come a long way in the last twenty years, and some people have sadly been left behind.

If you want a laugh, please go and have a look at the video. It's very long, I only lasted about 20 minutes so far but I intend to take a proper look later.

• 19:49 Preparing to nom quorn chilli.

• 10:09 Hoping my brother's flight doesn't get diverted...

• 12:45 Off to get ready to go out! T-minus 31 minutes and counting

• 18:10 Thinking it's very funny that Stephen Fry's link to info about tweetbombs has caved under the pressure...

There are entire Tom and Jerry cartoons available on Youtube!

Here is one of my all-time favourites, inspired by the cold and wet sityayshun at Nick and Shipscook's place of work today:

Subs posted hers, prompted by Usksider posting his, prompted by... you get the idea.

Here's my current desktop. It's a picture I found online that I liked. S'good to see icons on, yet still interesting to look at.

Gwaaarn, let's see yours!

• 11:20 Nom. Sausage sarnies and coffee.
• 14:01 Eeeew sneeze-snot in my hand!
• 14:32 Cursing Google: Google Sync = MobileMe features for free!
• 01:20 Goldfrapp are indeed marvellous.

It's amazing how the release of a bit of pressure can make things seem better. Like a hot muggy summer's day culminating in a thunderstorm.

It's a relief. It feels fresh. Refreshing.

Hopeful for tomorrow, and the day after, and the day after that.

Here's to tomorrow, and other things.

There was no EU release date. Bugger.

More storage, much thinner and lighter, text-to-speech and a few other bits and pieces, but no fecking EU release date.

Prepare to have some time wasted.

CLICKY

It's a bit like Little Big Planet. You have to make a little cart to transport coconuts over a rocky terrain as quickly as possible.

My record is 44% efficiency.

Bloody thing.

Although I've used twitter for a while now, I've not followed any celebrities before today. So I added Stephen Fry to my list, frowning to myself when I noticed most of his tweets seem to be replies to people. That could make for a lot of tweets; I imagine he gets millions of messages directed at him!

So imagine my delight when I got notified of his latest tweet, which began with the following phrase:

*pants for breath*

I've been giggling to myself for ages, picturing him exhaling boxer shorts.

I'm conflicted. This is not unusual.

There is to be an Amazon event in New York tomorrow, and with official-looking pictures and pricing details being leaked the clever money is on it being about the new version of their Kindle device.

The Kindle is a snazzy e-book reader. I've not used one, but the screen is apparently fantastic. It uses electronic paper rather than an LCD display, which basically means the display only refreshes itself when it needs to - great for battery life (thousands of page turns between charges), and perfect for static text like books or newspapers. It is supposed to be as readable as paper, relying on ambient light rather than a backlight. The screen is large, too, not like the "100 Classic Books" on the Nintendo DS; you can view a whole page with ease. It can hold up to 200 books in its built-in memory, remembering your place in each one - and you can use a separate memory card if you run out of room. You can annotate the books, like scribbling in the margins, but with more room. You can view many kinds of text files and it will display images pretty well, although they appear in grayscale.

There are plenty of other e-book readers out there with many of these features, but what makes the Kindle stand out is that it has wireless access to much of Amazon's massive library of books - currently 224,000 titles according to Wikipedia, with most new releases almost certain to be available in Kindle format. You can buy a book either from your computer or from the Kindle itself, and it is there on the device in as much time as it takes to download it. They also produce Kindle versions of newspapers and magazines, which are there waiting for you when you get up in the morning.

The main problems with the Kindle are that it is only available in the USA - the wireless network it uses to deliver content is not commonly in use elsewhere in the world - and that the books you buy from Amazon are in a proprietory format - you will only ever be able to use them on a Kindle. As I said, it will display other file formats, but the Amazon downloads are the star of the show, here.

I'm hoping that tomorrow, Amazon will announce a version of the Kindle that works outside the USA, or that they have managed to get cellular network operators outside the USA to support their network. Problem one solved, if I keep my fingers crossed.

Now. I love books. I have lots of books. Reading is, to me, a tactile experience. Holding a book, turning the pages - there's even a distinct smell, if it's an old book. I love to look at my bookshelf and see all my favourites lined up. A Kindle full of books can't compare to that. What about the social aspect of books. You read something, tell a friend about it and they ask to borrow it. Would you lend them your Kindle?

Can I give all that up for the convenience of instant gratification? The ability to just pick a book and start reading it, no waiting for delivery?

Moot point, actually. I can't afford one. But ooooh I covet one...

I think I may actually have minor frostbite - "frostnip", apparently.

I've never had great circulation in my feet, they're always cold. Yesterday, I was sat in the lounge, nothing on my feet except for socks, and when I got up to get a drink I couldn't feel my toes. I put the heating on for a bit and lit a fire.

Last night in bed, my toes were very sensitive to the duvet brushing on them.

This morning, a couple of them were swollen.

I've been looking online at pictures of minor frostbite. The pictures look like my toes.

The world wide web. Making hypochondria worse since 1989.

Unless, of course, it really is frostnip...

I haven't done nearly as much housework today as I meant to.

I'm gonna be in trouble...

*gets the hoover out*

NotBob just posted My Sharona by The Knack on his musicy blog. It's a fantastic track, great to sing along to.

My first exposure to that song was this scene from the vastly underrated* Reality Bites:

* Yeah, OK, so it's basically a non-film, nothing happens. But I love it all the same.

A post on Ooober's blog remound me of this nugget from a while back that I don't think I shared.

We were in a loud and busy pub in Galway, talking with friends about the benefits of sign language - ordering drinks across a busy bar, for example.

We showed them some BSL signs for their favourite drinks and then, seemingly out of the blue, one of them asked me what the sign for "masturbate" was. Bemused, I said I hadn't a clue, and jokingly did the "wanker" gesture you all know and love.

She was astonished! Wow! Really? As if!

Turns out she had actually asked for the sign for "pasta bake" - which we had eaten for tea.

Another similar story involves a deaf friend of ours at a launch event, who mis-lip-read someone offering her a plate of nibbles. She has the LOUDEST laugh, probably because she has no idea how loud it is, and spent much of the rest of the evening offering people her nipples, giggling hysterically.

From by here.

1. Have you kept your new year's resolutions?

Didn't make any, but if past years are any indication they would have all been broken by now!

2. Has 2009 been a better year so far than 2008?

In some ways, yes, in others, no. We're far more settled than we were, but we're back to one income again so there's not so much going out and having fun. Staying in and having fun is good too, though!

3. Name one big thing you plan to do in the rest of 2009.

Get a job! A good one! One I like!

4. Do you think the credit crunch will affect you more in 2009?

I think so, yes. Businesses are laying people off, not recruiting, for a start.

5. If money were no object, what would you like to do in 2009?

Have a fantastic holiday with Landers, somewhere hot and idyllic with lots of places to explore.

I postponed the trip to the shops for bloggage and news watchage, and now the lovely sunny yet windy day has been replaced with a stormy rainy hurricaney day.

I wonder what the dogs could eat instead of dog food... Generic rip-off Wheatabix and gravy with tinned carrots? Pasta? Hmm.

Oh, but I also need coal and peat blocks. Darn.

I'm going to get a bit wet.

Wow! Three nominations, and all different from previous years I think. I don't think I've got much of a chance this year, looking at who else is nominated in those categories, but it's lovely to be nominated. Thanks everyone who put me forward!

In non-bloscar related news, I just opened the packed of Haribo Tangfastics that Landers brought me from the UK, and Hillie perked up and looked hopeful. Makes me wonder what Landers has been feeding her...